8.5.08

This should be a poem, but I'm not a poet =[

You sit at your computer, home from school.  You open your mail program and click the Get New Mail button.  "Downloading message 34 of 112," the status reads.  You scroll through your folders, hoping that at least one of those 112 emails was written for you. You watch the Facebook folder, glancing occasionally at the download counter as the mail comes in, hoping that someone took the time to notice you.  It's done getting mail.  Not one of the 112 emails were written to you.  Just standard mail list traffic.  You open your iTunes, hoping that there's something there for you to listen to.  You switch back to your email and start reading mail lists. 

You switch over to your browser and open Facebook.  There's nothing going on there, either.  Just one friend is online, and there's a moon by her name. Then you type in the Facebook search box the name of someone special to you, but only you know.  You open up her profile and skim it.  You see the wall, but pass it by.  Nothing.  You click "home" and switch back to your mail and keep reading.  There's nothing to do.

An hour later, you're done reading everything that came in.  You look around.  There's still nothing going on on Facebook.  You click the "get new mail" button again, hoping that there's something waiting to come in to keep your mind off your situation for a precious few seconds.  Nothing. 

There's nothing to do, so you change into pajamas and go to bed early.  You lay there in the dark, thinking of everything that happened that day, everything you saw, all the things your friends and acquaintances did. 

You feel separated.  You have few friends, and you don't know them very well.  You feel separated from almost everything that is going on around you.

Your problem?  You're too shy.

No comments: